Today and yesterday has been a very "down" day emotionally for me. Surely I had good cause to be MORE than joyful as my blood tests are increasing on their own which is a good thing but I'm experiencing some emotional downtime between friends and loved ones that just should not be.
Except for writing, I am a poor communicator and sometimes things in my head get so "jumbled" up that they are not even understandable for me. And so there are times when I speak and it comes out like "lightening". Don't feel too bad, you all have similar difficulties when it comes to communication.
But as I sit here in my recliner the Lord has reminded me that I should not fear or be overly concerned with the things that may be lost (even in communication) here on earth, because His reward for me in heaven is 1000 fold better than that which I may someday leave behind.
I have an overwhelming love for those close to me, my friends and family and time is too, too, short for me, and others to live with our "shoes in our mouths". So tonight as I remove the shoe laces from my teeth and replace them where they belong, I do not fear, for I was "Wonderfully made" for the purpose of receiving the love from the Father.
If you feel unloved tonight remember that you too, were "Wonderfully created" in the image of God simply for fellowship with Him. All else is secondary to that love and fellowship. Go to the Father and let Him place His arms around you and assure you of His love, the love that lasts an eternity.
Dave
Crazy Papa
I'll make 'um an offer
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
Looking To The Reward
Heb. 11:24-26 says, "By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter; choosing rather to endure ill-treatment with the people of God, than to enjoy the passing pleasures of sin; considering the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of Egypt; for he was looking to the reward."
When you have an individual physical problem, there always seems to be "left turns when you were expecting right turns." First there is a cancerous disease, that slows life down to a turtle's pace. Then after years of treatment and the normal "ups and downs" other difficulties are added to the mix. Some people (referring to myself) just so happen to acquire additional diseases simply from accepting the treatment in the first place (boy is this disturbing to a person who tries to stay on the "up" side).
At any rate, my wife and I have continued to pray, as we have, from the beginning, left the "hard stuff" in the hands of the Lord, knowing that His Grace has always been sufficient. As I mentioned, there are "highs and lows" as you go through these treatments. I've met some wonderful people in chemo that I pray for and am sure that they pray for me. In fact, a good friend named Dennis, has begun to discuss Godly things with me which is what I believe for both our lives, this is what God wants.
Some of you may know that Barb and I have been trying for 4 months to get a Liver Biopsy done so we can at least know if I qualify for a Bone Marrow Transplant in the future. Well that biopsy finally was completed a few days ago and we got a call from the Liver doctor to let us know what it actually looks like. We were "stunned" to say the least and in "SHOCK" at this moment, still.
Barb wrote down what he read off the report and I want to share it in its entirety so you can see the reason we seem to be walking a couple of inches off the floor:
Diagnosis: Liver, needle core biopsy:
Minimal portal hepatitis with mild steatosis, compatible with clinical history of chronic hepatitis C (grade 1 inflammation, stage 0 fibrosis) (grade1 & stage0 are lowest levels of difficulty)
Comments:
Sections show portions of benign liver tissue in which the architecture is normal. There is minimal portal inflammation composed of lymphocytes. There is no interface activity or bile duct damage. the hepatic lobules show no significant inflammatory component. There is mild macrovesicular fatty change. No pigment deposition, granulomatous inflammation or metastatic tumor is identified. an iron stain shows minimal iron deposition. A trichrome stain shows no evidence of fibrosis. (end of report).
Of course there was a lot more but this was what was so amazing. When I had my first Liver Biopsy, it was much, much worse than this and I have never been treated for my liver because of other, more pressing issues. Can anyone say "Miracle of God"?
Heb. 2: 1-4 says, "For this reason we must pay closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it. For if the word spoken through angels proved unalterable, and every transgression and disobedience received a just recompense, how shall we escape if we neglect so great a salvation? After it was at the first spoken through the Lord, it was confirmed to us by those who heard. God also bearing witness with them, both by signs and wonders and by various miracles and by gifts of the Holy Spirit according to His own will."
How can all of this have anything to do with my Liver Biopsy? Because it has been continually "spoken through the Lord and unalterable angels so as to bring forth a miracle of great magnitude. MY LIVER IS VERY NEARLY PERFECT after all the chemotherapy, after all the antibiotics, after all the blood transfusions and platelet transfusions, not to mention the diagnosis of hepatitis C over 8 years ago.
In the beginning I quoted a passage of scripture explaining how Moses would rather live with the difficulties of his life than to "STOP LOOKING FOR HIS REWARD." Is this what we do? It is what I do. And I know, without doubt that "THOUSANDS" of wonderful Christian men and women have continued through the years to lift me up to the Father for HIS REWARD. Today, I believe I received a portion (a LARGE portion of that reward) and the results of these findings brings me ONE major step closer to a Bone Marrow Transplant, which they have always said was the only step to get to as a "life saving" step.
What a joy to wait on the Lord and finally see His marvelous miracles at work. How thankful I am that I experienced "so great a salvation".
There are too, too, many to say thanks to so just let me say, God loves you, just like He loves me. Keep looking for that reward because you have "so great a salvation."
Dave
When you have an individual physical problem, there always seems to be "left turns when you were expecting right turns." First there is a cancerous disease, that slows life down to a turtle's pace. Then after years of treatment and the normal "ups and downs" other difficulties are added to the mix. Some people (referring to myself) just so happen to acquire additional diseases simply from accepting the treatment in the first place (boy is this disturbing to a person who tries to stay on the "up" side).
At any rate, my wife and I have continued to pray, as we have, from the beginning, left the "hard stuff" in the hands of the Lord, knowing that His Grace has always been sufficient. As I mentioned, there are "highs and lows" as you go through these treatments. I've met some wonderful people in chemo that I pray for and am sure that they pray for me. In fact, a good friend named Dennis, has begun to discuss Godly things with me which is what I believe for both our lives, this is what God wants.
Some of you may know that Barb and I have been trying for 4 months to get a Liver Biopsy done so we can at least know if I qualify for a Bone Marrow Transplant in the future. Well that biopsy finally was completed a few days ago and we got a call from the Liver doctor to let us know what it actually looks like. We were "stunned" to say the least and in "SHOCK" at this moment, still.
Barb wrote down what he read off the report and I want to share it in its entirety so you can see the reason we seem to be walking a couple of inches off the floor:
Diagnosis: Liver, needle core biopsy:
Minimal portal hepatitis with mild steatosis, compatible with clinical history of chronic hepatitis C (grade 1 inflammation, stage 0 fibrosis) (grade1 & stage0 are lowest levels of difficulty)
Comments:
Sections show portions of benign liver tissue in which the architecture is normal. There is minimal portal inflammation composed of lymphocytes. There is no interface activity or bile duct damage. the hepatic lobules show no significant inflammatory component. There is mild macrovesicular fatty change. No pigment deposition, granulomatous inflammation or metastatic tumor is identified. an iron stain shows minimal iron deposition. A trichrome stain shows no evidence of fibrosis. (end of report).
Of course there was a lot more but this was what was so amazing. When I had my first Liver Biopsy, it was much, much worse than this and I have never been treated for my liver because of other, more pressing issues. Can anyone say "Miracle of God"?
Heb. 2: 1-4 says, "For this reason we must pay closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it. For if the word spoken through angels proved unalterable, and every transgression and disobedience received a just recompense, how shall we escape if we neglect so great a salvation? After it was at the first spoken through the Lord, it was confirmed to us by those who heard. God also bearing witness with them, both by signs and wonders and by various miracles and by gifts of the Holy Spirit according to His own will."
How can all of this have anything to do with my Liver Biopsy? Because it has been continually "spoken through the Lord and unalterable angels so as to bring forth a miracle of great magnitude. MY LIVER IS VERY NEARLY PERFECT after all the chemotherapy, after all the antibiotics, after all the blood transfusions and platelet transfusions, not to mention the diagnosis of hepatitis C over 8 years ago.
In the beginning I quoted a passage of scripture explaining how Moses would rather live with the difficulties of his life than to "STOP LOOKING FOR HIS REWARD." Is this what we do? It is what I do. And I know, without doubt that "THOUSANDS" of wonderful Christian men and women have continued through the years to lift me up to the Father for HIS REWARD. Today, I believe I received a portion (a LARGE portion of that reward) and the results of these findings brings me ONE major step closer to a Bone Marrow Transplant, which they have always said was the only step to get to as a "life saving" step.
What a joy to wait on the Lord and finally see His marvelous miracles at work. How thankful I am that I experienced "so great a salvation".
There are too, too, many to say thanks to so just let me say, God loves you, just like He loves me. Keep looking for that reward because you have "so great a salvation."
Dave
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Well Did I Happen To Mention
...That NOTHINGS gonna keep me from God, because His Word is forever hidden in my heart? Wasn't sure so I needed to get back up and clarify that point...lol
God Best Blessing on you today,
Dave (Papa Dave-which is my highest title here on earth)
God Best Blessing on you today,
Dave (Papa Dave-which is my highest title here on earth)
Hard Questions Reveal Very Difficult Answers
Today I had my last in this round of chemotherapy and after, an appointment with the Oncologist to get a final reading of the last Bone Marrow Biopsy. I was my jovial self throughout chemo treatment, however I could feel anxiety building up as I waited in the Doctor's office. Of course, we had read some of the report as we HAD to chase it down for the Doctor's office and naturally some of the 19 letter words were a little baffling.
So we asked all of our questions, as difficult as they were and were given difficult responses which left the decisions for my treatment right back in my lap. Ever wish someone in the car would just decide where we are going to eat and go there? Well, I kind of felt like that this afternoon. My Son and Daughter-in-Law were there to hear his findings.
My wife and I have battled "valiantly" against these diseases for coming up on 6 years now and have been very strong and God-inspired about the treatment. However, at this point the options (or rules) have changed. The MDS consults from UCLA in California were without emotional involvement, naturally so the results left us needing to make some very critical decisions.
Since the day it was announced that I had cancer, it has always been a "God" problem with me and tonight that remains the same. We have to make some very critical decisions for which we will continue to ask for God's guidance. I have lived my adult Christian life with the idea that "I can do all things through Christ who is my strength"!
I wrote this tonight knowing that most who read this will get it in the morning and honor me with prayer along with my wife and family who all have pressing decisions to make by the end of the month.
God bless you all and I will try to right again soon,
Dave
So we asked all of our questions, as difficult as they were and were given difficult responses which left the decisions for my treatment right back in my lap. Ever wish someone in the car would just decide where we are going to eat and go there? Well, I kind of felt like that this afternoon. My Son and Daughter-in-Law were there to hear his findings.
My wife and I have battled "valiantly" against these diseases for coming up on 6 years now and have been very strong and God-inspired about the treatment. However, at this point the options (or rules) have changed. The MDS consults from UCLA in California were without emotional involvement, naturally so the results left us needing to make some very critical decisions.
Since the day it was announced that I had cancer, it has always been a "God" problem with me and tonight that remains the same. We have to make some very critical decisions for which we will continue to ask for God's guidance. I have lived my adult Christian life with the idea that "I can do all things through Christ who is my strength"!
I wrote this tonight knowing that most who read this will get it in the morning and honor me with prayer along with my wife and family who all have pressing decisions to make by the end of the month.
God bless you all and I will try to right again soon,
Dave
Monday, June 6, 2011
My Redeemer Lives
Here is sit, the hour approaching 3 AM and I have just finished listening to a CD of songs sung by a famous Christian Artist, Steve Greene, and he finished his CD with "I know that My Redeemer lives" and it brought me to my feet and out into the living room where my trusty laptop sits and waits patiently for Words from God.
My thoughts turn to Revelation where Jesus Christ says, "I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last" and it helps me to realize that My Redeemer does indeed live, within my heart and as I lay in bed, hands and arms lifted in praise to Him, I want all who can hear (read) my thoughts to know that it is an awesome picture just to see and believe that our Lord Jesus, not only lives, but sits at the right hand of the Father, continually making intercession for us here.
These last few days have been difficult for me emotionally, as I have pondered the news about my bone marrow and the trouble it continues to cause my body, however, as I found myself lifting my hands toward the Lord while the music was playing, I thought of how much I wish to be with my Heavenly Father, along with my Lord, Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit, in worship 24/7 in my new home which He has prepared for me...that promise is in John chapter 14 and He is just waiting the Father's command to come for another of His little ones for an eternity.
I wonder! Are there others of you who think like that? Surely I am not the only one who "Yearns" for the return of the Lord, Jesus or waits "impatiently" for my opportunity to go to Him. Some of you MUST feel this way, yet I never get responses from anyone saying that they are so in love with the Lord that their every thought is in His second coming or our coming home to Him.
Well, I just wanted to tell you so that there is no doubt, that I humbly, impatiently, absolutely, definitely, anxiously, happily, filled with joy, anticipate His soon return for His Bride, the church, or our departure from this temporary home to be with Our Father, His Son, and the Holy Spirit so I can daily sit and worship His glory.
Sound a little mushy, maybe? Well, I'm not ashamed. That act alone completes the reason I was created onto this earth, to finally have eternally communion with the Lord. Are you that anxious? If you're not, I think that you might have your seeds planted too deep in this temporal earth where our time is limited, whereas our time in Heaven is eternal...eliminating all time and space as we worship. God.
Just thought I'd bring that to your attention. Longing for the return of the Lord or your day of meeting Him face-to-face, should be uppermost in your mind and heart as you stroll this earth sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ.
I love you, and I definitely Love the Lord.
Dave
My thoughts turn to Revelation where Jesus Christ says, "I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last" and it helps me to realize that My Redeemer does indeed live, within my heart and as I lay in bed, hands and arms lifted in praise to Him, I want all who can hear (read) my thoughts to know that it is an awesome picture just to see and believe that our Lord Jesus, not only lives, but sits at the right hand of the Father, continually making intercession for us here.
These last few days have been difficult for me emotionally, as I have pondered the news about my bone marrow and the trouble it continues to cause my body, however, as I found myself lifting my hands toward the Lord while the music was playing, I thought of how much I wish to be with my Heavenly Father, along with my Lord, Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit, in worship 24/7 in my new home which He has prepared for me...that promise is in John chapter 14 and He is just waiting the Father's command to come for another of His little ones for an eternity.
I wonder! Are there others of you who think like that? Surely I am not the only one who "Yearns" for the return of the Lord, Jesus or waits "impatiently" for my opportunity to go to Him. Some of you MUST feel this way, yet I never get responses from anyone saying that they are so in love with the Lord that their every thought is in His second coming or our coming home to Him.
Well, I just wanted to tell you so that there is no doubt, that I humbly, impatiently, absolutely, definitely, anxiously, happily, filled with joy, anticipate His soon return for His Bride, the church, or our departure from this temporary home to be with Our Father, His Son, and the Holy Spirit so I can daily sit and worship His glory.
Sound a little mushy, maybe? Well, I'm not ashamed. That act alone completes the reason I was created onto this earth, to finally have eternally communion with the Lord. Are you that anxious? If you're not, I think that you might have your seeds planted too deep in this temporal earth where our time is limited, whereas our time in Heaven is eternal...eliminating all time and space as we worship. God.
Just thought I'd bring that to your attention. Longing for the return of the Lord or your day of meeting Him face-to-face, should be uppermost in your mind and heart as you stroll this earth sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ.
I love you, and I definitely Love the Lord.
Dave
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